I mean, they already hit the jackpot — they’ve got us, so really, what more could they want?
But seriously… imagine life without waiting “five minutes” that somehow turns into an hour and a half. Or watching them spend an extra $19.95 just to get free shipping when shipping was only $9.99 in the first place.
Then there’s the classic “hold the flashlight” moment. You’re just standing there, doing your best, and somehow 75% of the time the light is either blinding you or pointing at everything except what you’re working on. Word of advice: if you ever had to hold the flashlight for your dad, do not use his method of “communicating” where the light should go.
And let’s talk about reorganizing — because nothing says “fun” like not being able to find anything after she “made it better.”
Or that time she starts talking to you from the other side of the house — then gets mad after the tenth “What did you say?”
And of course: “I want to drive your truck today; you can take my car.”
Then, right as she’s halfway out the door (finally within hearing distance), she says, “Oh, by the way, the car’s on empty.”
And it’s always either pouring rain or -30° when this happens.
Then there’s backing the camper into a new site — that magical time when hand signals turn into interpretive dance, and somehow “left” means “your left” until it doesn’t. She’s my own personal GPS — just with a slightly louder volume and no mute button. Every couple who’s survived that deserves a marriage medal.
And speaking of navigation… she’s also my official trip navigator — at least for the first ten minutes of any four-hour drive. After that, she’s out cold, blanket up to her chin, while I’m missing exits and talking to myself.
Every husband knows that slight chill that runs down your spine when she starts a sentence with, “I was thinking…” or “How long would it take to…” — because you know it’s not going to end with a nap.
Truth is, if anything ever happened to Dawn, I’d be completely lost. I’d be sitting in my chair, reading a book, when the power would go out — because I have no idea when the bills are due. Same goes for the water.
Now, I do know when my Harbor Freight and Home Depot cards are due… and exactly where they are. Priorities.
So for all the things that make us husbands shake our heads, we wouldn’t trade you for anything. Although, some days, a $500 shopping spree at Harbor Freight might make us think about it.
All jokes aside — and I’m sure a lot of guys would agree — I married way out of my league. I hit the jackpot with Dawn. My dad once told me, “If you’re married to the right person, nothing is better in life.” He was right.
Leave a Reply